Jesus waited three days to come back to life. 

It was perfect

 If he had only waited one day, a lot of people wouldn't have even heard he died. 

They'd be all, "Hey Jesus, what up?" and Jesus would probably be like, "What up? I died yesterday!" and they'd be all, "Uh, you look pretty alive to me, dude..." and then Jesus would have to explain how he was resurrected, and how it was a miracle, and the dude'd be like "Uhh okay, whatever you say, bro..." 

And he's not gonna come back on a Saturday. Everybody's busy, doing chores, workin' the loom, trimmin' the beard,

 NO. He waited the perfect number of days, three. 

Plus it's Sunday, so everyone's in church already, 

and they're all in there like "Oh no, Jesus is dead", and then BAM! He bursts in the back door, runnin' up the aisle, everyone's totally psyched, and FYI, that's when he invented the high five. 

Easter Sunday

 

Easter Poem (for John Cotton), by Ted Walker

I had gone on Easter Day
early and alone to be
beyond insidious bells
(that any other Sunday
I’d not hear) up to the hills
where are winds to blow away
 commination. 

In the frail
first light I saw him, unreal
and sudden through lifting mist,
a fox on a barn door, nailed
like a coloured plaster Christ
in a Spanish shrine, his tail coiled around his loins.

 Sideways
his head hung limply, his ears
snagged with burdock, his dry nose
plugged with black blood. 

For two days
he’d held the orthodox pose.

The endemic English noise of Easter Sunday morning
was mixed with the mist swirling
and might have moved his stiff head.

Under the hill the ringing
had begun. As the sun rose red
to press on seemed the best thing.

I walked the length of the day’s
obsession.

 At dusk I was
swallowed by the misted barn,
sucked by the peristalsis
of my fear that he had gone,
leaving nails for souvenirs.

But he was there still. I saw
no sign. He hung as before.
Only the wind had risen
to comb the thorns from his fur.

I left my superstition
stretched on the banging barn door.

Easter Sunday

 

The Easter Sunday is celebrated for the resurrection of Jesus Christ. It marks his return from the dead, which is the cornerstone of the Christian faith. The resurrection of Jesus Christ is prominent to the Christian belief that salvation and eternal life are possible by having faith in him

Jesus came to earth to save humanity by dying on the cross on Good Friday and resurrecting on Easter Sunday. By enduring and defeating death sacrificially for people, He swung open the gates of heaven making a way for sins to be forgiven and usher Christians into the presence of God 

Easter Sunday is a religious Christian holiday that is observed globally to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ and while holidays like Christmas have fixed dates, the date for Easter changes from year to year. According to the Bible, it marks the third day after Jesus was crucified when he rose from the dead.

The resurrection narratives in the Gospels portray Jesus as raised to life on the third day in his crucified body, leaving behind him an empty tomb.

Jesus referenced Jonah's three days in the belly of the great fish as a metaphor for his resurrection. Hosea spoke of God's resurrecting work for Israel as occurring on the third day

The early church believed that after his death Christ descended into hell in order to rescue the souls of the righteous, such as Adam and Eve. Jesus descends and breaks down the doors of hell, unbinds the prisoners and leads the just to heaven.

Based on the wording in 1 Peter, there's an argument that Jesus spent the weekend between His death and Resurrection in Hell preaching to the souls who were already there, giving them a chance at the forgiveness available through His sacrifice not previously available before His death.

Acts 1:1-3? First, it indicates that Christ's ascension occurred fully 40 days after Easter. In other words, he was on earth, at least intermittently, for substantially more than a mont

In His revelations to St. Faustina, Our Lord asked for a special prayer and meditation on His Passion each afternoon at the three o'clock hour, the hour that recalls His death on the cross.

 

So don't knock the guys on death row

Maybe they know something you don't

 

There was only one guy in the whole Bible Jesus ever personally promised a place with him in Paradise.

 Not Peter,

 not Paul, 

not any of those guys.

 He was a convicted thief, being executed. 

 

In religion people’s beliefs and convictions are  gotten at second-hand,

and without examination, 

from authorities who have not themselves examined the questions at issue 

but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, 

whose opinions about them were not worth a thing 

 

Every faith in the world is based on fabrication. 

That is the definition of faith―

acceptance of that which we imagine to be true, that which we cannot prove. 

Every religion describes God through metaphor, allegory, and exaggeration, from the early Egyptians through modern Sunday school.

 Metaphors are a way to help our minds process the unprocessible. 

The problems arise when we begin to believe literally in our own metaphors.

 

Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities

 

The merest accident of microgeography had meant that the first man to hear the voice of Om, and who gave Om his view of humans, was a shepherd and not a goatherd. 

They have quite different ways of looking at the world, and the whole of history might have been different.

 For sheep are stupid, and have to be driven.

 But goats are intelligent, and need to be led.

 

Take the Kama Sutra. 

How many people died from the Kama Sutra as opposed to the Bible?

 Who wins?

Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God

Good Friday

 

Good Friday

 

Commemorating Jesus' crucifixion, Good Friday is a solemn day of mourning and reflection for Christians, who often attend special church services and prayer vigils. Good Friday is a part of Holy Week, which includes Palm Sunday, Maundy Thursday or Holy Thursday, and Good Friday, leading up to Easter Sunday.

That terrible Friday has been called Good Friday because it led to the Resurrection of Jesus and his victory over death and sin and the celebration of Easter, the very pinnacle of Christian celebrations

Christians believe that when Jesus was executed he sacrificed his own life so that everyone can be forgiven for their sins. Because of this Good Friday is one of the most important dates in the Christian calendar.

As such, special Good Friday services are held in churches in which the suffering Jesus experienced in his death is remembered and mourned.

On the morning of Good Friday, Jesus was taken to the Roman governor, Pontius Pilate. The governor didn't like the fact that people called Jesus a king, but he didn't think Jesus deserved to be killed.

Because of this he told the large crowd of people outside his palace that they could decide whether Jesus should be freed. Nonetheless, the crowd called for Jesus to be crucified.

Jesus was then beaten by the Roman soldiers and made to carry a heavy wooden cross on his back all the way through the city to the place he was to be killed. The soldiers mocked him and made him wear a crown made of thorns which made his head bleed.

Jesus's terrible journey through Jerusalem with the cross is known as the Stations of the Cross. On the journey he met many people, including his mother, Mary.

Finally, Jesus was nailed to the cross he had carried, and placed between two thieves who were also being crucified. At noon the sky turned black and the Earth shook. Eventually Jesus died.

Eostre

 

Eostre

 

Eostre is the Germanic goddess of dawn who is celebrated during the Spring Equinox. On the old Germanic calendar, the equivalent month to April was called “Ōstarmānod” – or Easter-month. As a holiday, Easter predates Christianity and was originally the name for Spring Equinox celebrations.

The date of the Christian celebration of Easter changes each year and the reason the date changes is because it is based on a ‘Pagan’ solar calendar. Easter occurs on the Sunday after the first full moon occurring after the Spring Equinox.

“Esotre seems therefore to have been the divinity of the radiant dawn, of upspringing light, a spectacle that brings joy and blessing, whose meaning could be easily adapted by the resurrection-day of the Christian's God."

“Bonfires were lit at Easter and water drawn on the Easter morning is, like that at Christmas, holy and healing - here also heathen notions seems to have grafted themselves on great Christian festivals. Maidens clothed in white, who at Easter, at the season of returning spring, show themselves in clefts of the rock and on mountains, are suggestive of the ancient goddess.”

Eostre, also called Ostara or Eastre, is a Germanic goddess associated with spring and the dawn. She is particularly known in Anglo-Saxon and Old High German traditions and is believed to be the namesake for the Christian holiday of Easter.

 Eostre as the name of a month corresponding to April and suggests that the festival of Easter may have been named after this goddess.

Eostre is generally associated with themes of fertility, renewal, and the changing of the seasons, as her name is etymologically linked to words related to dawn and the east, where the sun rises. She is often depicted with symbols of spring, such as eggs and hares, which have become integral elements of the modern Easter celebration.

The three things Jesus said on the cross

"Great way to spend Easter"

"John I can see your house from here"

"Judas, you fucking grass!"

 

sing Hey diddle diddle 

The cat and the fiddle 

the pigs in the middle

are what a fine riddle

and haven't you heard 

That the cockatoo bird 

Would repeat a rude word 

Til the panther demurred 

and threatened to plaster 

it's peco disaster

come let us sing faster and faster and faster

Then Jack and Jill stumbled 

And down the hill tumbled 

my Cookie quite crumbled 

the elephant  mumbled 

with weeping and wailing 

it jumped off the railing 

and found it was sailing 

along and a-paling 

then cried The Mad hatter 

pay heed to my chatter 

come take this white platter 

and fry it in batter

my song is all sung 

to untangle your tongue

take the refrain

and sing it again 

 

Fear prophets, 

and those prepared to die for the truth, 

for as a rule they make many others die with them,

 often before them,

 at times instead of them.

 

An atheist believes that a hospital should be built instead of a church.

An atheist believes that deed must be done instead of prayer said.

An atheist strives for involvement in life and not escape into death.

 
He wants disease conquered, poverty vanished, war eliminated 

 

Religion is for people who're afraid of going to hell. 

Spirituality is for those who've already been there

Casey at the Bat

 

The outlook wasn't brilliant for the Mudville nine that day:
The score stood four to two, with but one inning more to play,
And then when Cooney died at first, and Barrows did the same,
A pall-like silence fell upon the patrons of the game.

A straggling few got up to go in deep despair. The rest
Clung to the hope which springs eternal in the human breast;
They thought, "If only Casey could but get a whack at that—
We'd put up even money now, with Casey at the bat."

But Flynn preceded Casey, as did also Jimmy Blake,
And the former was a hoodoo, while the latter was a cake;
So upon that stricken multitude grim melancholy sat,
For there seemed but little chance of Casey getting to the bat.

But Flynn let drive a single, to the wonderment of all,
And Blake, the much despisèd, tore the cover off the ball;
And when the dust had lifted, and men saw what had occurred,
There was Jimmy safe at second and Flynn a-hugging third.

Then from five thousand throats and more there rose a lusty yell;
It rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell;
It pounded on the mountain and recoiled upon the flat,
For Casey, mighty Casey, was advancing to the bat.

There was ease in Casey's manner as he stepped into his place;
There was pride in Casey's bearing and a smile lit Casey's face.
And when, responding to the cheers, he lightly doffed his hat,
No stranger in the crowd could doubt 'twas Casey at the bat.

Ten thousand eyes were on him as he rubbed his hands with dirt;
Five thousand tongues applauded when he wiped them on his shirt;
Then while the writhing pitcher ground the ball into his hip,
Defiance flashed in Casey's eye, a sneer curled Casey's lip.

And now the leather-covered sphere came hurtling through the air,
And Casey stood a-watching it in haughty grandeur there.
Close by the sturdy batsman the ball unheeded sped—
"That ain't my style," said Casey. "Strike one!" the umpire said.

From the benches, black with people, there went up a muffled roar,
Like the beating of the storm-waves on a stern and distant shore;
"Kill him! Kill the umpire!" shouted someone on the stand;
And it's likely they'd have killed him had not Casey raised his hand.

With a smile of Christian charity great Casey's visage shone;
He stilled the rising tumult; he bade the game go on;
He signaled to the pitcher, and once more the dun sphere flew;
But Casey still ignored it and the umpire said, "Strike two!"

"Fraud!" cried the maddened thousands, and echo answered "Fraud!"
But one scornful look from Casey and the audience was awed.
They saw his face grow stern and cold, they saw his muscles strain,
And they knew that Casey wouldn't let that ball go by again.

The sneer is gone from Casey's lip, his teeth are clenched in hate,
He pounds with cruel violence his bat upon the plate;
And now the pitcher holds the ball, and now he lets it go,
And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey's blow.

Oh, somewhere in this favoured land the sun is shining bright,
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light;
And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout,
But there is no joy in Mudville—mighty Casey has struck out.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep

 

 

The poem itself acts as an extended metaphor for the conflict between desire and obligation.

 

The speaker stopped by the woods to observe the natural beauty and snowfall in the woods. He wanted to enjoy the calmness of the dark, deep, lovely woods.

 

The poem is often interpreted as conveying an attraction toward death, indicated in the final lines: 'The woods are lovely, dark and deep, but I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep. ' Here, the woods and the 'sleep' to which the speaker refers represent death.

 

' taps on several themes such as life, death, commitment, pessimism vs optimism, and darkness. The main theme of this piece is the journey of life. It is present throughout the poem and highlighted in the last few lines.

 

The text of the poem reflects the thoughts of a lone wagon driver (the narrator), pausing at dusk in his travel to watch snow falling in the woods. It ends with him reminding himself that, despite the loveliness of the view, "I have promises to keep, / And miles to go before I sleep."

 

The speaker is stopping by some woods on a snowy evening. He or she takes in the lovely scene in near-silence, is tempted to stay longer, but acknowledges the pull of obligations and the considerable distance yet to be traveled before he or she can rest for the night.

 

The horse thinks it is "queer" or odd to stop in the middle of the woods because it seems his owner never does this. We know this because the speaker tells us that his "little" horse is used to stopping near farmhouses.

 

Hence, the phrase "miles to go before I sleep" means that the poet has a lot to achieve in life before death descends on him

 

Woods represent sensuous enjoyment (lovely), the darkness of ignorance (dark) as well as the dark inner self of man (deep). The last two lines mean that the poet Robert Frost has to fulfill his promises and has to travel a lot of distance before he can rest.

 

The speaker's thoughts and reflections on this "darkest evening" reflect his sense of isolation and contemplation in the midst of nature